docs.datacontroller.io/slides/if/if.md

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<h1> IF</h1>
<h2 style="text-align:center"> An Ode to<br/>Data Control</h2>
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<b>If you can keep your data when all about you</b>
&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<i>Are losing theirs and blaming it on you;</i>
<b>If you can trust your metrics when analysts doubt you,</b>
<i>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;But make allowance for their doubting too:</i>
<b>If you can query and not be tired by waiting,</b>
<i>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Or building models, adjust for outliers,</i>
<b>Define ETL modules that are self-validating,</b>
<i>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;And require contracts from data suppliers;</i>
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<b>If you can report — and not make KPIs your master;</b>
<i>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;If you can forecast — and not make compliance your aim,</i>
<b>If you can make the overnight batch faster</b>
<i>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;And ensure the end results are just the same:</i>
<b>If you can't bear two versions of truth spoken</b>
<i>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Produced by silos to make a trap for fools,</i>
<b>Or watch systems you gave your life to, broken,</b>
<i>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;And stoop and build em up with off-the-shelf tools;</i>
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<b>If you would make one lake with all your data</b>
<i>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;And risk it on one vendor's big bang plan,</i>
<b>And lose, and start again at invitation-to-tender</b>
<i>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;And salvage from the project, what you can:</i>
<b>If you can force your flat files and mainframe</b>
<i>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;To serve datamarts when key DBAs retire,</i>
<b>And so hold on when stakeholders proclaim</b>
<i>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Why (oh why) is our Data Quality so dire?</i>
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<b>If you can talk with architects and keep your virtue,</b>
<i>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Or walk with CEOs — nor lose the accounting touch,</i>
<b>If neither UTF-8 nor PII can hurt you,</b>
<i>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;If all teams count with you, but none too much:</i>
<b>If you can keep Data Owners beholden</b>
<i>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;To uploads that are timely and accurate and whole,</i>
<b>Yours is the Earth and clean records (golden),</b>
<i>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;And—which is more—youll have Data Control!</i>
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<h2 style="text-align: center"> https://datacontroller.io </h2>